Interviews.

Here are three examples of me on job interviews.

1. NYC 2010, interviewing for a hostessing position after leaving (sketchy) non-profit job of three years.

Interviewer: What's something you're really proud of that you've done lately? A big goal of yours that you have accomplished?

Me: Quitting my old job.

Interviewer: Excuse me?

Me: Hey, I'm really proud I actually quit.

Yes, I did get the job which was kind of terrible because there were so many cheeseburgers in front of me all of the time and I was too broke to actually eat them.

2. Retail work 2011, looking for seasonal holiday shift.

Interviewer: Tell me about a time that a co-worker was doing something you didn't agree with and how you dealt with it?

Me: Well, when I was counseling kids, one of my co-workers was in a cult.  It was quite bizarre. I noticed that she was inviting the parents of the students to her church and didn't think this was right so I went to my supervisor, who was aware of her affiliations.  He told me to tell her to stop.  I tried to tell her but it was awkward because I worked with her all of the time. But yeah, I don't think she stopped.

Interviewer: Ah, what?

I also got this job.  Somehow it had the most intense training ever despite the fact that I wasn't saving lives or anything....much more training that actual counseling had.  How does that make sense??

3. Montessori classroom assistant 2012.

Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.

I tell her where I lived blah blah blah what I've done for work blah blah blah my experience working with kids blah blah blah that I love writing blah blah blah have done some comedy blah blah blah. "Oh!!!!! And I really love cats and cheese!!!!"

Interviewer: Yeah, cats and cheese are good.....

Not sure if I got this one, but I did treat myself to a great iced coffee and two chocolate munchkins on the way home!