Badassery!

Hi folks!

I read this self-help (yeah, yeah) book this past week called "You are a Badass. How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life." and I gotta tell ya, it's totally working.  So, either you know me, or you don't, but chances are, I come across pretty positive-proton-awesome in my writing. That's because I like to spread cheer and whatnot! The problem is, often I spread a lot of positivity onto others and then go all Negative Nancy on myself. How does this make any sense?! Well, it doesn't.  And I have decided to stop, damn it! I am currently on this crazy train where I have stopped second guessing myself and have instead started to give myself some credit on how awesome I am.  It is a wonderful feeling.  If you are hard on yourself, I suggest you read this book, and well, just try and be kinder to yourself. You deserve it!

There is a lot of negativity in this world.  It is so easy to get sucked in! Tired! Broke! Hate job! Terrible love life! The list goes on! But, there is also so much to be thankful for! Fo sheezy.  I have started to watch the way I think because as the good ol' people say, your thoughts become your words which in turn, become your actions, and so on.  I have always been one to give stellar advice to others, but then to question every single thing I say and do.  It's preposterous! No more! Also, I am trying to steer clear of words like "I want," "I hope," and "I wish".  The reason being when you "wish" for something, for example, it adds a negative connotation, like what you want is something that needs to be wished for, not something that can happen in actuality.  I'm not wishing for anything anymore.  I am just certain shiz is good and will continue to get better.  Try it out, peeps!

As mentioned there is a lot of negativity out there and it is easy to get sucked in.  Sometimes you want to talk to a sir or madame who is nonjudgmental.  This is why I occasionally hit up a counselor and tell her of my life stories.  Yesterday, I was babbling away about my love life, and she stopped me in the middle to tell me that she felt that she was watching a stand-up monologue. Yes, people the "love" life is one of tragedy, but in it, also comedy, because you gotta find the humor in all of the muck! So much muck you'd think I was a pig rolling around in dirt, I tell ya!

So, I decided to cancel my National Credit Report account because I am trying to pay off my credit card, and a monthly $15 fee is not helping.  The lady on the phone was the best.  I want to be her friend.  She lives in Pittsburgh.  She loves snow because there are no bugs, and ya know, I am more of a summer gal, but I had to agree with her on this one.  She has a beta fish.  She does not like dogs, but she likes cats, and thinks my cat sounds really cute.  Her cousin lives in Massachusetts but she has never been, but she would like to visit.  Unfortunately, I was so into our conversation that I naturally pressed a button accidentally and hung up on her.  I did call back and connect with a Lisa.  I told Lisa that I have short term memory and already forgot the name of the lovely person I was chatting with but could she please tell her I said goodbye.  Oh, Lisa was very nice too. And I canceled that fee, holla! Moral of the story: talk to people! Except if they are negative.  Then punch them in the throat! Jokes....

Oh, so I am working with kids who speak no English.  I figured out that the key is to teach them the word "yes" because then I can say, "Do you think I am awesome?" and "Am I your favorite teacher?" and all that and they always say YES! Great feelings!

Okay, go out there and be the badasses I know you can be!!!

Chipotle and bad things happening in 3

I'm live blogging from Chipotle. I have a burrito bowl obsession. I used to go four days a week....right after yoga. I have since weaned my way down to once every other week. Still, I'm there now. And this is why. I have been feeling very content with life lately. I've had my share of ups and downs and I have been maintaining. Just a couple of years ago I was living at home, feeling like a failure, and crying on the regs. Since then, I got my masters, have been making strides at work, started eating Chipotle, and pet my cat in my sweet apartment.  I had even made a guy friend or whatever.  I say or whatever because that seems more accurate of a term. I came very close to securing a dream job last week. I was getting closer with "or whatever". I was feeling pretty swell. Then poof, unraveling left and right.  I decided to at least start being vocal about stuff instead of my usual people pleasing pushover self. So I am proud of this. Trying to get myself in the best possible place at work, expressing feelings to "or whatever," and making an appointment with a specialist because my Celiacs is acting a-fool. I even made an appointment with my counselor for a tune-up. During my counseling sesh, my counselor tells me that she read that all Chipotles are closing. I LOST MY SHIT.  I said, "It always happens in threes! Job, guy, Chipotle.  I cannot deal." I left the office and went straight to Chipotle where I proceeded to tell the worker how in counseling,  I heard that all Chipotles are closing and that I cannot deal with life. The worker assured me that this was in fact a hoax. And thank god cuz I don't know how I'm supposed to deal with my life without my burrito bowls.

Priest Pants.

To say that I have been slacking on this Bad Larry is basically the understatement of the year. I am not really sure where I have been for the last couple of months, but I think I'm back?!

Well, and to be fair, I know where I was from July 8th-18th: Iceland and Paris. Bam! Yeah sure, I'll tell you all about it, though of course most likely in an out-of-sequence order and in complete ramble form. You know how I roll.

Before I get started, please take note of what I am working with computer-wise:

Yes, the giant, growing red slash is really great for the eyes. Nope. I have an old computer from my dad that I tried to restart, but it is also feeling "critical". C'est la vie.

Anyway, back to my out-of-sequence events!

So, I went to Iceland for my pal Cassie's wedding to her dude Phil.  

This is Cassie and Phil on our honeymoon (stories to come) in Paris:

So much joy as you can see! Now they wouldn't have gotten to this point of marital flight if they didn't have a dude to marry them. Please see photo below:

The ceremony was tres beautiful and I'll go into details regarding it at a later point.  But first, to the basics.  The priest, Petur, was a cool dude. When Phil would get misty as he is quite aware that he warmed Cassie's self-described "cold heart," and that they are sealing the deal, Petur would tell him to relax and to let loose. None of that misty business allowed! 

These are Petur's pants:

Please excuse the poor quality of the photo. I was trying to be sly in capturing the purpley leopard pantaloons.  Since I had the great responsibility of signing as witness (or something...what exactly did I sign??!!), Petur and I ended up chatting. There was lots of handshaking and for some reason he was thanking me, even though I did diddly squat.  Petur then insisted on exchanging phone numbers. Evidently he is not on the Facebook. Ten minutes of him trying to call me as I stood there and him typing me messages in front of me went down.  He then offered to have me stay at his apartment when I was back in Reykjavik the following two nights. Nice dude, that Petur.

The next day I was greeted with a few paragraphs of texts from the fashionable priest man.  Highlights include: "U like 2 stay at my little apartment so u save some for the wool with pattern ;)" and "And then you could host me in the U$A??" I ended up passing up on his offer; crashed illegally on a hotel couch one night and hung out with a ghost hunter and listened to a dude talk about how we are all "one" the next (more to come on these). 

For now, I will leave by saying that I am not sure that I am ready to be back from my great adventures.  However, I am happy to be able to listen to "The Gentle Touch" on WBRU, and to pet my cat, duh.  "The Gentle Touch" is pulling out all the jams! Raspberry! Blackberry! So much hairbrush belting is going down right now...

Anyway, more to come. Stay classy, people!

#587,345,234,096 of what is my life right now/ever?!

So, I had to call a cab company this morning so I could get to the train station and get up to Boston for my graduation  ceremony.  I called  a few companies, and finally  get through to a dude.  I went outside to wait, the van pulls around the corner and I get  in. So far, so good.  Dude gets on the highway,  not my first choice, but it's  doable. After a few minutes, it becomes evident that we are  not going to the train station.  Meanwhile, both van dude's phone and my phone are blowing  up all of a sudden. Evidently, a girl in the next apartment  over from mine called  for a car service at the exact  same time that I had, and I stole her van man. What strikes me is the fact that my street is like three feet  long. Seriously,  what are the chances?! Anyway, my neighbor lady is freaking  out and the other cab dude  keeps calling  and yelling at me. It's not even 6:15 am people.  I finally get to the train, and some dude from match.com is sitting across from me. I get up and move.  I literally  cannot deal with  that right  now either. 

Anyway. While this doesn't even come close to  my strangest cab experiences (man playing a flute while driving  me prob  tops the list), it certainly was a great wtf to start my day.

KILLING IT.

So, I've been pretty much non killing it for the last three months to five years.  Here's the reasoning: I mean, life.  Dude, it's exhausting being alive.  One has got to work and go to school and talk to people.  How does one maintain??

Well, today, I had a good day, Ice Cube style.

For one, I killed it at work.  I was all teaching like whoa and not sweating the small stuff.

Then, I did super adult stuff.  For instance,I  actually tackled my to-do list. It's been the same to-do list for the entire winter, rewritten in multiple notebooks, and consistently looming over my head.  Fun stuff---figure out student loans, reschedule physical appointment, file a claim of sorts. Done. Done. Done. Granted, taxes, a whole other story... And well, by figuring out student loans, that basically means I called a bunch of peeps up and told them I had no idea what I did when I previously pulled an adult and consolidated.  Still, progress.

Next up, yoga.  While there seems to be a lack of hot guys lately, I am dealing by not being terrible at my practice all of a sudden.  It's like bam! Wheel, got this. Camel, holla. And, Boy George, finally nailed that crow.  And today, my instructor held my feet up and I did a headstand and while it kind of hurt my head and I needed assisting, what a rush, I tell ya. Good stuff.

Then, I came home, and do you know what I did? I ate adult food, like chicken and spinach, and I made a killer mixed cd for cruising to work (entitled: Get it right. Get it tight). To top it off, I made bacon so I can have a bacon and avocado something at some point tomorrow.

Part of the reason that I am (hopefully) emerging from the winter funk for the rest of the year, is that not only do I have good peeps in my corner, but I'm cheerleading myself like a crazy. There has been a definite increase in singing aloud in public assuring myself that it's just life, no biggie smalls. It's working people.  So, even if you look a little nutter butters because you're singing "you got this. what what what" in public, I totally recommend it and assure you that it is worth the what-are-you-on-right-now looks.

Plus, it's almost summer and it will be a breezy 80 degrees and life will be so splendid.

As usual, this was pretty pointless.

Belated Condolence Cards?

Earlier I wrote a post about my two wonderings of the day: 1. a question regarding a Coolio lyric and 2. am I moving my arms enough while walking?

A third thought has now entered my mind:

3. So, I'm into greeting cards.  They are a dying form of communication.  I often buy them, but the reality of me actually sending them is another matter.  A couple of posts ago I wrote about a shark valentine.  I cannot send it currently because I don't have a boyfriend and randomly sending it to anyone else would be pretty creepy.  I have a few more random and equally awesome cards stored away, waiting for the right moment.  Now, here's the thing.  When sending a card, you need a. a recipient b. a stamp and c. to mail it.  I often have a combo of the two but generally not at the same time. Sometimes I get to the c. (mailing it) part and nothing happens.  I just can't make it to c.  The problem with this is, so yeah, a belated birthday card---acceptable, within reason.  I'm usually out of reason in that I send the card that I bought before your birthday around 5 months after your birthday, but still, it's sort of acceptable.   Right now, I have some hey you're having a baby, thinking of you, and condolence cards to mail out, all of which should have been mailed out 1-2 weeks ago.  Okay, so hey you're having a baby I can probably get away with not sending for a couple of more months, ya know, until the baby actually happens.  But condolence cards? How can you send a belated condolence card? It's like sorry your boyfriend broke up with you 3 months ago. Sorry your pet died 8 months ago.  I really need to buy stamps tomorrow or else I'm essentially going to be mailing dear friends a lot of miserable memories.  Ah!

And that was my third thought of the day. Back to practicing the worm. I think I am actually getting it!

Gangsta's Paradise

The snow is making me legit stir crazy.  I need to run 10 miles outside immediately or I'm going to lose it.  Since that is not actually a possibility right now, I am settling by practicing the worm, with the strobe light disco ball on, and blasting hip hop music.  This post right here, it is literally just a commercial break from the worm.

Speaking of hip hop music, I keep wondering about a line in Coolio's "Gangsta's Paradise".  Fun Fact: I did a jazz routine this song when I was 9ish.  Anyway.  In the song, he goes, "I'm 23 now, but will I live to see 24.  The way things are going I don't know."  I always wonder: was he really 23 when he wrote this song? I tried doing math today and I think he would have been more like 30 something, but maybe he was talking about when he actually wrote the song? Or maybe he is just being all metaphorical? Is it weird that this is what is going on in my head? Kind of a lot too? Like I've thought about this numerous times in my life.

I had one other thought today (slow thought day).  I was walking down the street and was wondering if I was moving my arms enough.  I think they move at a normal pace generally, but with winter and sleeping bag coats, I feel like stiffness or something creeps in, and then I am reminded of the Summer of George Seinfeld episode where Elaine's co-worker (Molly Shannon) doesn't move her arms enough.